If it's not a “yes, of course”, it's a no

The writer and musician Derek Sivers put it almost as a blurt: “hell yeah or no.” Faced with an invitation, a project, a plan: if your immediate reaction isn't clear enthusiasm — a “yes, of course” — say no.

It sounds radical, and it is on purpose. Calendars don't fill up with horrible things, which reject themselves: they fill up with “fairly interesting” things, lukewarm commitments accepted out of politeness, just in case, or to avoid disappointing someone. Each one looks small; added together, they are the reason there's never time for what truly matters.

The rule works because it turns a fuzzy negotiation (“will it be worth it?”) into an instant observation: what did you feel in the first second? You already had that piece of data; you just lacked permission to use it.

Two honest caveats. One: it applies to the optional, not to duties (nobody feels a “yes, of course” about renewing their ID). And two: it's a rule for full calendars. If you're starting out and have time to spare, do the opposite: say yes to almost everything, until saying no becomes necessary again.