At the Accent Office they let me keep one word

OFFICE OF PHONETIC REGULATION — DEED OF RENUNCIATION No. 7,412

Appearing party: Teodoro Vilches, scaffolder, fifty-one years old. Clerk: Nieves Abaurrea, counter officer. Entry 13:20. Duration of the appearance: eleven minutes.

Reason stated by the appearing party: «On the phone they make me repeat the quote three times. Three times, and on the third they hang up.»

Clause 6, reserved word: the appearing party keeps ONE word with its original pronunciation. He is warned that the choice cannot be undone.

Word chosen: down.

Clerk's note, for the file: he was offered his mother's name, the name of his village and his daughter's name. He turned down all three. Asked why, at 13:31, with this file the last of the twelve I had left to close that day, the appearing party answered word for word:

«When a pole comes loose, my down lands half a word before yours. And half a word is a foot.»